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Select Baseball Dad

My 12 year old son loves baseball.  He's pretty good at it so he has been playing on what has been termed a "select team".  What does that mean?  Well, it means a couple of things.  One, the boys who play on the team have some natural talent at the aspects of the game and desire competition a little more stiff than what your general recreational league provides.  Secondly, it means that there is no guarantee of how long your son will play or where he will play in games as it is up to the coach to keep the team competitive.  Lastly, it means that a lot of parents get together almost every weekend and yell at umpires.

My Select Baseball Son

Having been a "select baseball dad" for several years now I have gained quite a bit of wisdom in what it means to be a select baseball parent.  Baseball season is in full swing now so I thought this would be a good opportunity to share what I have learned with other parents.  The following is not a complete list, and I welcome other parents to impart their wisdom that I may have missed or even gotten wrong.  Here we go:

1.  Winning is not everything, unless winning means you are not the first game at 8:00AM on a Sunday morning.

2.  All of the umpires on the ball field are compensated for their time, so don't feel guilty about letting them know how you feel about that last botched call...

3.  There is already a first and third base coach on the field, and I am sure they don't need our help in telling the base runners what to do.

4.  A great weekend tournament is not defined only by the competition present but also by the concession stand prices.

5.  Tournament directors who schedule 3 hour breaks between a team's seeding games should be forced to work in a day care center for a day.  By themselves.

6.  $150 on a baseball bat is considered cheap.

7.  Pebbles shaking around  in an empty water bottle is the most annoying sound a baseball parent can make.

8.  A home run on errors looks just as good on the score board as one that sends the ball over the fence.

9.  It's OK for your child to be late to school on Monday morning if they have a new $3.00 baseball tournament championship trophy to talk about with their friends.

10.  It's OK for parents to be late to work on Monday morning if their son has a new $3.00 baseball tournament championship trophy to talk about with their friends.

11.  The dads who are not coaching always have a unique and better perspective on how each game is managed and will discuss this quietly amongst themselves as to not distract the coaches who are coaching presently.

12.  Regardless of the game situation, parents yelling at the coaches of the opposite team never results in a positive outcome.  I've tried this a few times and found it to be true.

13.  Insulting an umpire's mother will not change his mind about ejecting you from the park in the first place.

And finally...

14. When the games are not going your way, liquor may seem like a good idea but never is.  Beer, however, is another story all together...

Did I miss something?  Feel free to add your comments below.